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Hello! Thank you so much for wanting to spread Hope and Support to people all over the world that are battling depression and other mental illnesses. We have such a need to help spread light to those that need it most, so it is ever so appreciative.

Here's how our volunteer program works...

Choose a person from the list below, and then you then can write a personal, inspirational letter to them. It can be whatever you want to talk about, as long as it is inspirational and upbeat. Typical Letters are about 1-4 pages. Feel free to introduce yourself, talk about your experiences with depression (if you have any, not a requirement), and basically just look to connect with them. Feel free to include an email or return address if you would like in your letter, in case they would like to write back.

Name: Jessica

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: My name is Jessica, I am 19 years-old and I just recently realized that I suffer with depression although it is something that I have been dealing with my whole life. I never saw myself as good enough and always feel like I come in second or third place to everyone. I feel as if everyone in my life just leaves and I am always alone which makes me scared to let people in because I am scared of getting hurt again. As of recently, I tend to stay to myself one because it is too hard for me to see other people happy while I feel like I am dying on the inside and two because I never want to let my sadness affect the happiness of other people so it is just easier to be alone but being alone often is hard. I feel as if I don't have a support system throughout this journey and the hardest part of my day is getting out of bed and starting my day because I have no motivation or energy to do that.

Address: New Brunswick, NJ


Name: Jade 

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I've been diagnosed with depression since my senior year in high school (Which was 2 years ago) and I was struggling silently about a year and a half to two years before I was diagnosed. I struggled mostly with self esteem issues, negative thoughts and suicidal thoughts. 
I've been on medication since December of this year. And I've been better. So I've dedicated my life to help others who was just like me. Mentally ill and/ Or suffering silently. I want to counsel and teach mental health. I try to help as much and I can by helping people on apps for this type of community (vent, talklife, etc), I have a blog where I shared my full story and try to spread advice, positivity and awareness on it. And I hope to one Day get involved with this wonderful organization!

Address: Mechanicsburg, Pennsylvania


Name: Cassidy 

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I am 18 years old, I will be turning 19 in October. I have been through a lot of bullying in my past that lead up to depression, anxiety, self harm and ptsd. I have a lot of health problems such as IBS, Hyperlaxity, Hypermobility, High Frequency Hearing Loss, Anxiety, and Asthma. I hate having all of these problems. I am going on 4 years of being free from self harm, depression and suicidal thoughts. It's just so hard living with all of these health issues. I know God didn't give them to me, but most of the time I just don't know what else to do except to just live with it.

Address: Oxford, Alabama


Name: Christie

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I'm 19. I've self harmed before. Really wanting to start it again. I have always been deprecated from my family relationally. I'm not good at communicating I love coloring

Address: Las Vegas, Nevada


Name: Tamzin

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I'm a first year uni student with longstanding depression and anxiety. I was previously dissociative which was a fun sitch but am no longer. 
Idk, I guess I've been struggling a bit recently with family issues, the transition to uni, and the beginning of a new relationship that a lot of my friends disagree with (came from a strong Christian background, now in a non-monogamous relationship). 
So that's my situation right now. 
(((Also puppies and board games and nice people are great)))

Address: Wellington Point, Queensland, Australia


Name: Shawn 

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I'm a 29 y/o African American woman who suffers with mild to moderate depression. I was diagnosed in college. I've had a lot of setbacks in life including losing a full-ride scholarship, taking more than 4 years to graduate from college, being in several dead-end relationships with guys who don't value me. My already low self-esteem has suffered tremendously over the past few years. I'm world-weary and physically exhausted. My life seems like nothing but a series of setbacks, heartbreaks, and mistakes. I just need a kind and encouraging word from someone who cares.

Address: Birmingham, Alabama


Name: Kimber 

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I have been struggling with depression for several years now. The doctors have tried multiple different medications but they usuallt don't work long term. I'm currently on a new medication, but I just don't have any hope that it'll work because of all of the past medications. It's also been really hard with a lot of my personal things going on in my life currently like my parents divorce. Sometimes you just feel so alone and like things will never get better. If they do get better, it won't last very long.

Address: Tipton, Michigan


Name: Makenha

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I'm a 17 year old, and I've dealt with social anxiety since 3rd grade, and with depression since freshman year. I just got into a fight with my best friend (well call him dummy. also somewhat an old crush) becaude he likes my friend. But my friend hates him, and if I tell him something he doesn't like, he gets mad. I told him that she doesn't like him, and he blew up on me, and I blew up back on him. I feel useless now, and I just told my current bf that I feel depressed. I'm so upset right now that I'm blaring My Chemical Romance, and wanting to cut. I promised my friend in SC that I wouldn't and I've been almost a year clean. Life just gets so hard for me and I don't want to deal with the heartbreak anymore. Dummy/friend leaves in 14 days to FL for a month and I wanna spend time with him, I just don't want to fight anymore. I don't know what to do. I, for once, need advice. Thank you whoevers writing this.

Address: Chamberlain, South Dakota


Name: Kirsten 

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I've battled depression and suicidal thoughts since I was about 10. I developed severe anxiety around the age of 15. I have a history of self harm. I'm now 17(closing in on 18), and though my anxiety has decreased significantly, I still battle the rest of it. I'm a firm believer in God, so prayers and/or bible verses added in my letter would be wonderful. Thank you.

Address: Nocona, Texas


Name: Colton

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: Well, my Name is Colton, I'm 15 and a sophomore in high school. I run track and cheer. I'm gay and have been bullied most of my life. I recently have stood up for myself but I just get into trouble when I do. This causes me to just stand down and take it. I attempted suicide twice.... once in 5th grade and once in 8th. Both times a friend intervened and talked me to stop. I haven't really had depression for a while until about December 2016. Ever since Then I have had severe waves of depression almost everyday. When this happens I just want to go lay down and not wake up. I usually cry and I can't think of a reason why. Well, I mean I feel excluded at school. I'm always the last to be chose, even though I'm extremely social. I just need someone who is in the same boat as me to talk to. Someone who knows how it is. Also I feel very anxious all the time.

Address: Stanford, Kentucky


Recipient: Louise 

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: Hi, I'm Louise. I'm 27 years old, I am a support worker for adult with learning disabilities. I have struggled with anxiety and depression since my mum died in 2010. My childhood was very hard and traumatic. My dad has now just been recently diagnosed with Stage 4 Lung Cancer which they are not able to operate on. He's been given approximately a year to live depending on if Chemotherapy works or not I am really struggling with all the stress and worry at the moment, I'm finding it hard to keep afloat. I'm alright if I'm kept busy throughout the day but certain things trigger it off and then my mood will be low for the rest of the day. The family is really struggling with this news right now, my sister is making things difficult. She is causing unnecessary arguments and stress for my dad which is causing me more stress now. I could deal with the cancer and that worry but now I've got extra stress from my sister causing tension and it's just getting too much now. I just feel deflated all the time. I'm spending all my free time down with my dad which is putting my anxiety up as I'm not usually around so regularly as his behaviour sets it off but I don't want to miss out on the last year of my dad's life so I am putting my anxiety on the back burner for now but really struggling at the moment. I'm usually a snail mail writer myself, I have lots of penpals all over the world so I respond quite well to just siting down and reading a heartfelt letter which is why I have chosen this. I love photography, reading, walking and just relaxing doing nothing with my boyfriend of 8 years who I don't see hardly right now due to being down with my dad so much. My dad is an hour and a half away so it's not a short trip unfortunately. Sorry this is so long but I thought I would write how I was feeling rather than giving you the "short story". Thanks so much for writing to me if you do :)

Address: Chippenham, Wiltshire, United Kingdom


Recipient: Courtney 

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: My name is Courtney, I'm 18 & I suffer from Depression, Anxiety, Borderline personality, and dependent personality disorder. My life has definitely not been easy and a lot of the time I struggle to keep going. I had a difficult childhood with neglectful, abusive and emotionally unavailable parents.. I also suffered an ongoing trauma from 6-9 years old. I have recently been hospitalized twice for the risk of suicide. I got discharged from and inpatient psychiatric unit yesterday but I'm still struggling with thoughts. I so desperately want to live my life differently, without feeling encased in a whirlwind of mental illness that is quite literally taking over my life, and has been for a while now.

Address:  Calgary, Alberta, Canada


Recipient: Samantha

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I'm 19 years old. I grew up in a small town, my mother is a recovering alcoholic and was an active alcoholic most of my life she has only been in recovery for a year. I suffer from major depression and I tried to commit suicide on the 10th of February. I have since been put on medication. I also suffer from anxiety and ptsd. I have a beautiful 4 year old daughter who I had when I was 15. She's my world.

Address: Gothenburg, Nebraska 


Recipient: Sara

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I've been depressed and had bad anxiety the majority of my young life (I'm 18). This past year my life took a bad turn when I went off to school. I had been struggling on and off with an eating disorder for almost 2 years by the time I went off to school; I lasted 5 days away from home before I was so unbearably lonely that I wanted to end my life. So I withdrew myself from college and came home. I started at a new school when I got home but felt (and still feel) like a failure and disappointment for coming home. When I got home I started seeing a psychologist and started on an antidepressant that didn't seem to be working, so I tried a new one. After 4 days of being on pristiq I ended up suicidal and was brought to the hospital, where I was released the same day and a referral for a psychiatrist who I have been regularly seeing (every 2 weeks). This past month I received my 4th concussion and had to withdraw from school until next September, this situation on top of my eating disorder made me spiral out of control. Up until now I have stopped eating and it terrifies me to start. I'm so afraid to gain any weight or let myself lose the control I have of restricting (I'm afraid I'll start binging). I have such a fear of food, I know once I start eating I'll hate myself. But I want to get better, I'm so tired of living this way, it's hard because I don't look like I have an eating disorder so a lot of people are surprised when they find out. I truly just want to be happy and lessen my anxiety around everything in my life. As well as recover from my eating disorder.

Address: Niagara Falls, Ontario, Canada


Recipient: Teresa

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I've had depression since I was in my teens, I was bullied at school and my family didn't understand how much it was affecting me. I got into trouble with the police as I was trying to get my family to support me the only way I could see at the time. I then got placed in a psychiatric unit away from my local area and from there I went on to have three marriages, four children, two miscarriages and every marriage ended through violence of some sort. My last one being the most traumatic, I've been isolated from everyone since I got divorced and been trying to cope with having lost contact with my middle two children and raising my youngest daughter just turned fifteen, I had problems getting her to attend school and was fined for this although I had been through the process of working with the teachers to try to make things better for her. Everything failed and I went to social services and our doctor for help. My daughter was then diagnosed with some form of psychotic illness and placed voluntarily in hospital over two hundred miles away from me. Social services then decided to take me to court to obtain a care order, I almost lost my mind. I have fibromyalgia and osteoarthritis which affects me tremendously and without my daughter felt there was no reason to live.
Both my daughter and myself are still living apart and on occasion we self harm. The day can be good sometimes but recently my moods have been very low, I badly scratched my neck as the emotional pain is too much for me to cope with, I'm unable to trust easily and will only do so if I feel sure it will be confidential so it's left me with no friends and unable to turn to my family due to past experience and issues. Please can you help me, I'm alone in a place where I really don't belong 

Address: Lowestoft, Suffolk, United Kingdom


Name: Allison

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: My name is Allison. I just turned 25 yo. I have been diagnosed with bipolar depressant ever since I was in elementary school, and I have never been medicated for any of my symptoms my whole life. Mainly because my grandmother didn't want me to live life like her mother, heavily medicated. She tried to teach me ways to prevent myself from getting down, but my depression always won. I never had many friends and the friends I have don't truly know me. I can't seem to hold a relationship with anyone without messing things up. I was just diagnosed with anxiety 2 yrs ago because of my stress life as an adult. I just started working again since December when I was laid off from my previous job. My holidays were the worst. I feel tired every day that I have to get up at 3 am to go to work the support my disabled mother and my baby nephew's. I live in a house that is currently in foreclosure and I don't know when I will receive bad news from my attorney to move out. Almost everything I own is broken or falling apart and I obviously can't get ahead in life to fix anything yet. I was recommended by the crisis text line to give this a chance because I enjoy writing, but mostly talking to someone with wisdom and good advice about my problems and stress. I am willing to try anything once and I hope this letter against depression can help me.

Address: Middletown, Indiana


Name: Mary

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I've felt with depression, anxiety, PTSD, and anorexia. I've tried to kill my self 5 times now and most of my friends have left me. So I kind of need someone to remind me it's gonna be okay..

Address: Akron, New York


Name: Jamie 

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: Hi I'm Jamie, I'm a 22 year old college student and I'm just really trying. I'm trying to find the positive in myself, trying create a life worth living, trying to make it through each day. I've had many losses in my life and they have left a huge impact on me. I'm currently trying to overcome my anxiety, depression and self harm. While this hasn't been exactly easy lately, I'm trying.

Address: New York, New York


Name: Cathryne 

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I am 16. I have struggled with self harm and anxiety since I was 9. I lost my father figure at age 10 and it seems things went downhill from there. Both parents are incarcerated. They have been in and out of jail due to drugs all my life. i live with a wonderful grandma. I have done a fair share of suicide attempts and 7 hospitalization. I have been diagnosed with bipolar, borderline personality disorder, PTSD, OCD, and depersonalization Derealization dissociate disorder. I take lots of medication and I am constantly fighting these illnesses. I stay at home a lot and am homebound schooled due to the severity of my anxiety.

Address: Glen Allen, Virginia


Name: Gillian

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: Hi. I am a 24 year old graduate student in structural biology with an undergrad degree in veterinary medical technology. My passions are science and animals, particularly animal rescue. I also like audiobooks, cooking, and hanging out with my dogs. 
I grew up in a fundamentalist christian religious sect so my Depression went untreated for awhile. I left when I was 17 and have been on my own since, financially and otherwise. I (finally) wound up in therapy two years later and agreed to medication because I couldn't deal with it on my own anymore. That kinda saved my life and got me out of some of the more destructive ways I was self medicating. I was able to get my head on straight enough to apply to grad school and started that three years ago. 
In some ways I think grad school has made my depression and anxiety worse. I am currently dealing with suicidal and self harm ideation and lots of anxiety. I am in therapy and not actively suicidal or anything....it's just isolating and exhausting a lot of the time. I do have a partner who is supportive but I feel bad always dumping my problems on him and always being negative. Anyway long story short I am writing this at 4 am after another night with very little sleep. Mid semester stress is really getting to me. I want to say thank you doe considering writing, this is a really fantastic idea.

Address: West Lafayette, Indiana


Name: April 

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: My whole life I've kind of been tossed from place to place, like when my parents got divorced when I was 7 my mom lost the house and had to go to Texas with her sister. I was with my dad and I was happy until he got a girlfriend who hated me, along with her bratty little daughter who always got me in trouble. I finally got sick of them and after my mom moved to Florida I went to stay with her. After 3 years of emotional abuse and heartbreak after heartbreak, I came back to my home state AZ and stayed with dad again. I came back about a year ago and we're really happy now living on a ranch with 2 horses, 6 dogs, and a little kitty, but I'm still depressed and anxious all the time and have constant panic attacks.

Address: Marana, Arizona


Name: Mikayla

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: My name is Mikayla. It seems that I have fallen back into that hole called Depression. I have this pattern of losing my best friends. I am always replaced with someone better. This has happened three times and just a few days ago it happened again. I'm tired of feeling like someone's leftovers. I'm just tired of life in general. I just want to know that someone out there cares. A little bit of hope would be nice.

Address: St. James, Minnesota


Recipient: Rosie

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: The problem is not how to say it but where to begin trying to explain... I didn't know what depression was til I was 11 and had experienced it for myself. I was always bullied and had very few friends. Back then I heard about people committing suicide and wondered if I'd be able to escape like them. I was introduced to a girl who was 17 at the time as I had only been 13 for a few months. She was awesome and we were inseparable and always got into trouble somehow without meaning to. In the 2 in a half years I was friends with her I hit some of my lowest points that I thought I'd never come out of. It was during these years with her my anxiety and panic attacks were made because of her older brother by 2 years. He would verbally abuse me saying I'm nothing and other things, he'd physically abuse me.. he almost chocked me to death sometimes I wish he did. I've cut during these times thinking and screaming at night what'd I done wrong to deserve any of this. I'd become hollow as my friend.. his sister said my boyfriend at the time that I loved so much was cheating on me... he wasn't but I believed her... it made me go through maybe stages of madness, sadness, then to being hollow. I thought about killing myself I thought it'd only be easier on everyone if I no longer was in their lives. But two of my friends... my saviors stopped me. Convinced me not to and tried to help me. I actually started to love one of them because of it because he wasn't letting me push away like I'd done to so many others. He made me tell him what was wrong and hold me while I cried on his shoulder. He's helped me more than he even knows. Though it's been a few years since I'd seen them... I saw her brother in January at the library. I was terrified what was I to do? He looked and knew it was me. Thoughts flooded of if he'd hurt me if he'd try to try such a thing in public as I rushed into the girls bathroI'm trying to call the one person who'd be able to calm me but no answer I exited only to see he was waiting for me on the stairs. He nodded to me as I passed brushing my arm with his as I tried to not run like I was just burned. The nightmares of him still haught me almost every night.. I've cried to the person I could to hear him say he'd never let anyone hurt me ever again. I've been crying to him to take me away from this town as all I see are reminders of what occurred those years ago.. I can't even walk like I used to love around town on a nice day without feeling like I'm going to pass out. My depression is bad again though I wouldn't tell him as to not worry him and hear his words of "cheer up". I only can when I'm away from this town. Only then do I breath easy. I don't bother talking to my friends of my problems because they have their own and I'd rather help them than to focus on my own. Though they torment my nightly thoughts causing me to be awake until 4 am reading books or writing books to try and keep my mind at ease. Even now after everything his words ring in my ears saying how worthless I am and other things. I can hardly look in the mirrior without thinking a negative comment. I've started drawing on my arm again trying to resist the urge to do harm again as that'd only hurt my friends if they happened to see them. Sometimes I wish my godfather was here still he'd never have let this happen he'd have been able to read through my lies of "I'm fine" or "sorry I was lost in thought". I worry I've disappointed him and that he looks down on me in disgust since I wasn't able to save myself... though I get told he'd be very proud of me.. all I can do is hope and I don't have a lot left

Address: Hoopeston, Illinois


Recipient: Mary 

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I am a 19 year old girl and I have been chronically depressed for about 7 years. I also have severe Trichotillomania and agoraphobia. I have been getting better this past month and becoming less depended on other people. I have gained weight though and I have a bad body image of myself. I have never met anyone with similar diagnosis as me, but I hope I can get some kind words from someone here. I have been seeing a therapist for about 2 years and I am on several medications. I am interested in helping children and animals. My cat is my world. I am also Christian and look to God for some peace. I also just started college as of January 2017. I am only taking one class this semester, so I hope I can get an A. My goal is to be an elementary school teacher. I hope I can find true happiness soon.

Address: Yucaipa, California 


Recipient: Samantha 

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I'm 19 years old. I grew up in a small town. I suffer from major depression and I tried to commit suicide on the 10th of February. I have since been put on medication. I also suffer from anxiety and ptsd. I have a beautiful 4 year old daughter who I had when I was 15. She's my world.

Address: Gothenburg, Nebraska 


Recipient: Claudia 

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: Hello, my name is Claudia I am 21 years old. I come from a Mexican Family with 2 older brothers my mom and dad. I work for Spectrum communications as a dispatcher. Meaning I have to stay sitting for 8 hours a day. Which is very difficult for me. I was diagnosed with Social Anxiety when I was about 15 years old. I always knew I wasn't "normal" but coming from a old school family they told me it was all in my head and never took me to a doctor. Once the doctor told them my diagnosis they didn't believe him said the doctor was crazy and we left. Ever since than ive felt so alone with this. Ive also suffered from depression when I was 14 never wanted to leave my room for the whole summer. I didn't eat didn't leave my room I weighed 87 lbs and had 0 friends. Luckily I had to start school and was forced to come out of my room. Unfortunately I was always bullied about how small and little I was. I began using Xanax and Paxil. I got very attached to my medicine I was starting to feel better. But part of me still felt so lonely. I constantly fought with my own thought on wanting to give up. I eventually made a few friends, not good ones though. I began smoking marijuana drinking a lot of alcohol. As of right now im on the verge on falling into deep depression im so afraid for myself. I don't want to go home right after work because that's when the thoughts come piercing into my brain. Its painful no one understands. I always just get told to move past it as if its so easy.

Address: La Puente, California


Recipient: Alyssa 

Tell me your "story"...The more you share, the more personalized of a letter we can send!: I am 24 and will be 25 in April. I love drawing, painting, music, jigsaw puzzles and reading. My favorite color is yellow but I also like purple and teal. My favorite animal is a hummingbird. I used to read dystopian type books but now I'm reading books that I can relate personally to. Reading has always been an escape for me. Right now I'm reading a book called Girl in Pieces. I love drawing and painting flowers. My grandma had a beautiful garden. She passed away a few years ago. Butterflies, flowers and hummingbirds remind me of her. Her favorite flower is the yellow rose. I love my family but I don't get all that much support from my parents. Trust is very hard for me. I've put trust in people only to have it betrayed. I have a few friends. But they are true friends. I have an older sister but we aren't all that close. 

I am going to school to become a teacher. I still doubt myself sometimes if I will be able to actually teach. Will I be good enough of a teacher? Will I even make it through all the classes I need to take? Some people say I should go into business and accounting. I'm good at math and I like numbers-they always stay the same and there is always an answer. But I can't see myself in a desk job. Business would be too easy. I want a challenge. I work with kids at 3 different jobs during the week. There's only been 1 job where I didn't work with kids and that was only a seasonal job. I love working with kids and being able to help them and watch them grow. 

I was diagnosed in 3rd grade with OCD. I was diagnosed with bipolar II and clinical depression in 4th grade. I've been on meds since then. Over the last 3 years I've been through 4 episodes of feeling suicidal and the urge to self harm. But I'm proud of myself that I reached out for help and didn't do either of those things. Over those 3 years I've really discovered who my true friends are. It hurt finding out people who I thought cared about me didn't care at all. Over the last year I have become proactive in caring for myself. I see a counselor at my college who is an intern and currently in school for becoming a therapist-that makes us closer in age which I think helps me feel more comfortable. And the fact that they are still in school means they are learning newer ways to approach and handle things and won't be so "old fashioned". The first counselor I went to see at school helped me in such a powerful and amazing way. She helped me out of the black hole and gave me tools that I use everyday to keep fighting depression and anxiety. She helped me believe in myself and find my strength. Some days it's hard to fight it. Other days it's a bit easier. Im still having trouble and finding motivation is really hard. But I'm working on it.

Address: San Jose, California


Terry

Monticello, Indiana

I am 66, a retired medical provider. Cared for my father in my home for 10 years. He died last April 1 @ age 87. My younger sister died unexpectedly in January 2014. I never married. Now I find I am a 66 year old female who drinks 1-2 bottles of wine most days. I tend to isolate. Have been on antidepressants for as long as I can recall. No suicidal thoughts now, but have experienced idealizations of suicide in my 20's. My parents divorced after 30 years of marriage. My mother still alive, yet bitter over being rejected by my Dad. Right before my 60th birthday, she announced that I was the "worst mistake" of her life & she "wished you had never been born". We are estranged now, last visit was Thanksgiving. She has returned or rejected birthday & Christmas gifts from me. She bad mouths me to all who will listen, including my brother(I was oldest of 3 kids). I have reached out multiple times in past years but she always hurts me, so I avoid contact, yet have some guilt. She is still angry that I cared for my Dad.


Alyssa

San Jose, California

I am 24 and will be 25 in April. I love drawing, painting, music, jigsaw puzzles and reading. My favorite color is yellow but I also like purple and teal. My favorite animal is a hummingbird. I used to read dystopian type books but now I'm reading books that I can relate personally to. Reading has always been an escape for me. Right now I'm reading a book called Girl in Pieces. I love drawing and painting flowers. My grandma had a beautiful garden. She passed away a few years ago. Butterflies, flowers and hummingbirds remind me of her. Her favorite flower is the yellow rose. I love my family but I don't get all that much support from my parents. Trust is very hard for me. I've put trust in people only to have it betrayed. I have a few friends. But they are true friends. I have an older sister but we aren't all that close. 


I am going to school to become a teacher. I still doubt myself sometimes if I will be able to actually teach. Will I be good enough of a teacher? Will I even make it through all the classes I need to take? Some people say I should go into business and accounting. I'm good at math and I like numbers-they always stay the same and there is always an answer. But I can't see myself in a desk job. Business would be too easy. I want a challenge. I work with kids at 3 different jobs during the week. There's only been 1 job where I didn't work with kids and that was only a seasonal job. I love working with kids and being able to help them and watch them grow. 

I was diagnosed in 3rd grade with OCD. I was diagnosed with bipolar II and clinical depression in 4th grade. I've been on meds since then. Over the last 3 years I've been through 4 episodes of feeling suicidal and the urge to self harm. But I'm proud of myself that I reached out for help and didn't do either of those things. Over those 3 years I've really discovered who my true friends are. It hurt finding out people who I thought cared about me didn't care at all. Over the last year I have become proactive in caring for myself. I see a counselor at my college who is an intern and currently in school for becoming a therapist-that makes us closer in age which I think helps me feel more comfortable. And the fact that they are still in school means they are learning newer ways to approach and handle things and won't be so "old fashioned". The first counselor I went to see at school helped me in such a powerful and amazing way. She helped me out of the black hole and gave me tools that I use everyday to keep fighting depression and anxiety. She helped me believe in myself and find my strength. Some days it's hard to fight it. Other days it's a bit easier. Im still having trouble and finding motivation is really hard. But I'm working on it.


Tehreem

Punjab, Pakistan

I have never made close friends. Always been a close friend to people, never made a close one for myself. Used to share with myself only. And then came she. My only best friend. Who I trusted with my life. Called my twin sister, my human diary, my soul mate. We planned each others graduations, weddings, first child, we planned old age together. She wanted me to get married to her brother. She used to get so happy only at the idea of us officially being family. And now she has another best friend. I feel dead inside. All dead. Ive begged her. Ive cried and Ive cried till I couldnt cry anymore. Ive begged her. She says she hates me. She says she cant hurt her new best friend. The only one person I trusted. The only sister I loved. She loves another. Her new friend is possessive; she doesnt approve of me. I feel dead. I wish I could hate them both. But I love her. As my sister. As my support system. Please, please, please, help me cope. I cant imagine life without Zahra, it feels as if Ive lost a sister to death. I see the two of them together at college, and I break down, its ruining my life.